I was being dramatic, but this script is a mess. Sonic: Eggman is the worst director, I've ever worked with! Tails: You've never worked with another director, so technically he's also the best director you've ever worked with. Eggman: Anyone else have something to say about my script? Sonic: But who's gonna believe that an evil scientist with unlimited resources can't defeat a hedgehog? Yes Bot 2: Absolutely, you're totally correct. Yes Bot 3: I drink motor oil when no-one's watching. You present yourself as an underdog and an all-powerful tyrant which kinda makes no sense. I've been reading the rest of the script. Eggman: This footage is absolutely spectacular, isn't it, Yes Bots? Yes Bot 1: Oh yeah. Eggman: Action! Knuckles: Ow! Hot! Knuckles: Ow! Hot! Hot! Hot! Dr. Eggman: Cut! Great scene, Sonic! I like the new ending. Knuckles: And if you need me to do my own stunts, I also have a Knuckles costume. I want this to have universal appeal, and one thing everyone can relate to is having their robots destroyed by a meddlesome hedgehog. So? Amy: My client will definitely not be doing any stunts. You run up that wall, jump off the top, and do that incredibly annoying thing where you turn into a pointy ball and blow up my beloved machine. Eggman: In this scene, the Giant Robot chases you. Dave: I never stopped doing the catering! Oh no, my enchiladas! Dave: Lunch is gonna be late. You're gonna need someone to look out for your best interests on this movie. If you agree to play you, I'll let you have creative input on your character. Sonic: Because I knew you'd get it wrong! Dr. Eggman: Hey! Only I say cut! Sonic: This film is a joke! You cast Dave the Intern as me?! Dr. Eggman: What's this? Sonic the Hedgehog causing trouble yet again? I'll make quick work of that menace. Eggman: Let's go again in three, two, one. Eggman: Cut! Good, but remember, you're Sonic the Hedgehog, so make it louder and stupider. Maybe iffen I knock down enough robots, then chili dogs will fly out.ĭr. Amy: Do you have any idea what's going on outside?! Sonic: Judging by your outrage, I'd guess someone's having fun. Eggman: You know, you could encourage me once in a while! And they both have rotten eggs on the menu. It's somewhere in between, sort of like brunch. We all know this movie thing is just a ruse to distract us from some evil plan! Dr. It's the role you were born to play! Tails: Come on, Egghead. Eggman: He's an irritating character who constantly annoys me. How'd you like to play Sonic the Hedgehog in my film? Sonic: No way. The movie, and there may be a way to save the shot you ruined. Orbot, script! Sonic: Are you making a movie? Dr. Now I'm gonna have to rewrite the entire second act. Eggman: That robot wasn't supposed to be destroyed in this scene. Eggman: I'm used to you runing my plans, schemes, weapons, fortresses, confidence, and robots, but now you've gone too far! Sonic: What's that, Egghead? Dr. Sonic: Wanna throw me at its face? Tails: More than anything! Dr. Tails: Is it safe to assume that that conveniently timed event wasn't you? Sonic: Well it wasn't only me. There's something about their mediocre food that really makes my stomach rumble. Two double Meh Burgers with extra pickles. This is the transcript of the Sonic Boom episode, " Eggman the Auteur".
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